Awakening Marta, part 2

And what if you hadn’t

Kept working

What if you had sat down, as a disciple yourself

way back then?

If no one served, do you think Yeshua would have said:

“Hey Marta, get back in the kitchen!”

Probably not

*

Can you imagine a different story….

Lessons that we as a collective are learning now….

Consider:

What if we women

are actually blocking the ability for our men to Rise Up

and be MEN

to powerfully lead and serve

in the unique and honorable ways that the Masculine can?

What if we women are blocking the channels for our men to support us in being the Bright and Fierce feminine leaders WE are?

By “doing it all ourselves”

and resenting not being validated

By acting small

and resenting others who don’t act small

By hiding our Light

and seething with envy when others Shine

By wearing the the sheep’s clothing that really doesn’t fit

has really never fit

the kind of animals we are

*

Now, let me ask you

Can you handle it?

Can you handle giving up the illusory control?

Can you handle not trying to make yourself look good

or gain approval

from anyone else?

Can you handle drinking from the Fountain of Life

and facing your Self?

Can you handle admitting

who you Really Are?

Can you handle

stopping

the charade

the facade

That you have anything better to do

than Be Here Now

That you are a victim

of ANY of your experiences

That you have to conform

to something outside yourself

That this life isn’t actually

FOR YOU

*

Beloved Marta,

when will you stop

depriving the Living Well

from your beautiful

hungry

mouth?

*

 

Awakening Marta, part 1

Beloved Marta

Your story is still unraveling

Your rapture came later

For at the time

You couldn’t stop working so hard

Bound by rules and regulations and what a woman SHOULD do

Trying to win at your own game

But you didn’t, did you?

*

We never win that way.

Ego never wins.

Trying to get it “right” never wins.

Conformity never wins.

Giving our power away never wins.

Postponing our joy never wins.

Contraction

judgment

resentment

and all that holier than thou

bullshit

can never taste the nectar

of Love’s Liberation

*

See, Marta, beloved of the Beloved

You tell an important story

~ one we are still telling ~

For by separating yourself from Love’s embrace

By diligently working to serve the men

Acting like a dutiful woman

Doing as you were conditioned to do

Instead of Drinking

from the Living Well for your soul

you martyred yourself

denied your very self

and the choice was completely

yours

*

Beloved Marta,

come out of hiding

with all of your Shadow

and all of your Light

Come howling

Come hungry

Come undone

The Living Water is running through your circuits

And the nectar drips like honey down your spine

Beloved Marta,

It is time to serve the One who lives inside

and let the nectar drip like honey down your spine

*

 

When The Guest Arrives

I’m cleaning up around here

Oh, it’s been a mess

I’ve had to throw a lot out

A LOT OUT

And rearrange things

So energy can flow,

So oxygen can touch those hard-fast places

Where I had tried to keep Love’s face away,

in my shame

in my idea of not deserving Love’s glance

in my own rejection of That which I crave the most

*

I have a Sacred Guest

Who is bound to arrive

The moment I open the door

I smell Her fragrance like the lilacs and the jasmine flowers of spring

She’s right outside

I see and feel Her brightness

Even from behind these walls,

where I stand sweeping, sweeping

*

Sometimes my sweeping is born of devotion

In itself, the chore becoming a dance of Union

But sometimes, I’m just keeping my Guest waiting

Sometimes even sweeping is a form of hiding

from my Maker

The One who governs my very breath

even as She stands on my doorstep

Ever patient

Ever awaiting the thrill of a soul who wants only this Homecoming

*

And then, what can I do?

But strip naked in all of it

All the mess

All the effort

All the wanting and striving and formulated plans

All the habitual patterns and pre-conceived ways of

doing things

Strip naked

and stand before the Sacred Guest

Strip naked

and allow Love to touch this body

and allow Love to fill this mind

*

I open the the door

creak

and let the Guest enter the cave of my heartspace

wombspace

sacred space

every space

My nakedness is my innocence

And I am seen

*

There is still so much brokenness

Everything unfinished

Splayed out

Threads reaching back lifetimes

The imprints from my ancestors

The passed-on pieces revealing themselves

And the fragmented pieces

finding their way back to me

through this newly opened door

*

The Guest is here

(already)

“Come on in, it’s a bit of a mess”

“Nothing I haven’t seen before”

I laugh

I am seen

And my nakedness is my innocence

*